confused heart

What is this that I feel,
crammed up in my stomach churning,
the bass of the music keep beating in my heart,
i feel short of breathe,
seeing you made me confused.

But, its unlikely,
you saw me in the mist,
we met in a different world,
could it be that you feel the same.

Am I just a fool for myself,
are you just playing with my mind,
but,why? why now?
has somebody took out the blinds,
or are you replacing your lost heart.

Enough blades stabbed,
enough stones thrown,
i am afraid now,
I shiver when lions come to hunt,
so, I hide thinking I am protected

first week of holiday

Assignments are all done. I think I feel abit relieved, I have been playing L4D with friends and I think I am addicted to it again. Since there is no progress at all with both of the climbing dudes and I have no interest at all with my self absorbed scandal. I met another person, I like him,but, I need to talk to him more and get to know him more. I can't really judge how he is now really, I just need to see his personality in an in depth manner. This time, he does not have long hair,no squinty eyes, not fair,but, he is laid back and he speaks necessarily and he makes sense when he talks, which is good. I guess thats about it.

I have been trying my best to get my friends go climb with me because I do not have any stable climbing partner. Having a climbing buddy would definitely help,but, everyone just thinks I am boasting about it. Hmph, nevermind, I guess I'd just have to try to let them say they want to in their own free will.

the himbo that he is

This is what I think about you (my friend also one day scandal). I think you are good looking...that...I have to admit,but, the sad part is that you do not have any brains. The characters you have would be bland, you are the kind of guy that I would call a "himbo" (a male version of bimbo), you think highly of yourself and you know that you are good looking. When one or two girls don't wanna talk to you, you'd say really bad things about her,just because she does not want to talk to you. I pity you sometimes, but, hey, you can't have everything...although I think your brother is perfect. I know you want alot of girls around you and I only agreed to be your so called scandal because I think you're good looking..scrawny...but alright.
I do not care if you have a million friends in your facebook. I do not care if thousands of girls like you. I just wanted company. Although, you are quite selfish, you should feel ashamed of yourself. Why? haha...if you're reading...I think you'd know why. The first judgement would be, you're cool and you can be carefree like myself,but, when someone starts to talk to you, you do care about your friends looks, you do care about the fact that you'd have to be the center of attention. Oh men or for you maybe I should say boys, they are sometimes funny. Even though I can see all of your negative side, thanks for the cuddles,thanks for making my week up,now my housemate,adeline and I can have laughs and also coming to see me.

Putrajaya gym and stupid peple

I have to finish my work ASAP.I need and want to climb badly!!! The need is there! A friend told me that putrajaya is opening a new climbing gym,it would be the largest in the world...im not sure about it...but i hope its true...i dont have to go so far. Yesterday,fafa and I was stalked by a couple of african american dudes. Stupid people!

the guy in my dreams

I had a dream today. I dreamed that Ive a boyfriend.... I was sleeping and he woke me up and told me to bath (not with him),but,because we were suppose to go for a road trip. He carried me,because I could not get up. He had a long curly hair,quite fair, squinty eyes and has a whole lot of personality. Too perfect to be true huh. I also saw a set of drums in his house. aaah! what a dream. I didnt want to wake up but my friend went into the bathroom so, I startled. I also did a quiz...it says there "why are you still single?" and the answer to my quiz would be that I am a loser because I am in one. Since when?! Yeah, I am in one in my dreams, not real life. I wish it was real, I'd be really really happy if it was.
I know I wont probably get what I want in a guy,but, it would be really cool if I'd get someone to travel with. To do all my adrenaline adventure with. My semester is ending, so, my aim is to climb as much as possible and also to travel (not with family) but probably with friends. I might be working because I would need the extra money.

incubus- i miss you

I still love this song!!!

intemedated men

It is 10.40 am and I havent been sleeping at all since yesterday. I do that alot, waste my time and not sleep...assignments?...hmmph...whats that? maybe I should try find the meaning somewhere else and fail the subject. I am dissapointing my parents, this is too late to tell them but, I do not have any flare for this. I have passion in other things...I might have passion in culinary,no, I do not cook at home but I sure read alot of Anthony Bordain, have read his book for the 6th time,both kitchen confidential and the nasty bits...well, Ive read nasty bits only ones. No doubt about adventure and doing the extreme...thats the real passion that I am in.

I had a talk with a guy friend about guys and how they are. He said that most men are intemedated by women who are smarter than them. He said they prefer women who has good looks and dumb. I am not saying that I am smart,but, lets say if I know quite assumption of facts do I just keep quiet? He said yeah because men like to feed women those things and if the girl/woman knows more than them, they'd feel challenged and they wont feel like a man anymore. Than I think "wow...I should stop doing what I always do, and not be myself and make myself be like a bimbo...maybe just maybe guys might like me than".

My upstairs neighbour is very annoying...they party 2 days in a row and make really really huge noises that make me toss and turn because the bass of their music is too too loud and it doesnt stop till atleast 4 o'clock in the evening. Its soooo annoying!!!

dan osman

No rope..this guy is out of his mind...unfortunately he is dead,but this is crazy!!!